LIKE exercise…
Exercise is something I do to stay healthy, not because I love it. Over the years, I’ve experimented with almost everything — running, weight training, yoga, Zumba, and everything in between.
I love how I feel physically and the rush of accomplishment after I’ve worked out, but there seems to be some sort of disconnect between my brain and my body; — I’m always trying to find an excuse for not even going.
One thing is for certain: when I put in the time and effort to show up, I want to get a sense of achievement. This means sweating, aching muscles, and a racing pulse that says it was worth the effort.
A Path to Enlightenment — Or Not
When I tried yoga for the first time, I knew not to expect any high-intensity workout but hoped to unlock some secret path to enlightenment. I imagined a heightened, almost divine experience that would completely transform me.
Instead, I felt awkward and frustrated with the movements and the stretching. The attempt at in-sync breathing made me feel like a complete failure. That moment of spiritual awakening, where everything in my life just made sense, did not arrive.
Despite my lack of enthusiasm for yoga, I kept it up about once a week. I did not want to admit that yoga, to me, just seemed like a “bunch of stretching.”
Pure Survival
Then, I received a gift — a month of unlimited classes at a local hot yoga studio. The idea of exercising in a humid,100-degree room made me anxious. I honestly couldn’t think of anything worse, but somehow, I didn’t want to back down either. After all, it was a gift.
My first hot yoga class was pure survival. From the moment I stepped into class, I was hit by a heatwave that made me sweat in places I didn’t even know existed. The sweat was relentless and quickly turned my mat into a slip-n-slide.
I felt as if I was transported to some sort of alternate reality and the class became a blur. At one point, I started wondering if they kept an AED (Automated External Defibrillator) somewhere.
A Lifeline
Despite this brutal first experience, I kept going back to the studio. Not just once but three, four, sometimes even five times a week. And although I’m very sensitive to temperature and hate saunas, hot yoga somehow became my lifeline during midlife.
The combination of heat, movement, and breathwork aligned well with the physical and emotional changes I experienced at this stage in life. It helped release build-up anxiety, sweat out toxins, manage mood swings, and provide a space for mindfulness.
Here’s the thing, though — it doesn’t matter if it’s hot yoga or something completely different. The key is finding whatever pushes you to discover something that makes you feel empowered. Maybe it’s something you never even thought about or didn’t want to do in the first place.
Preparing Myself for Change
Midlife can be a challenging time. Suddenly, I felt the need to reevaluate my goals, purpose, and priorities. However, that didn’t always align well with my level of energy.
My kids were moving out; I experienced physical changes, mood swings, and fatigue. Just to mention the tip of the iceberg. In times of transition, I needed to be able to adapt and be resilient. So, how did I prepare myself for that?
Just like yoga isn’t an easy way to enlightenment, I found there is no easy fix to the challenges we face as we age. It’s all about the work and effort we invest in ourselves, and midlife is just a part of an imperfect but exhilarating journey called life.
There’s a turning point. It arrives when we find ourselves quietly hovering inside the realization that the choice is between two pains: the pain of the jump and the pain of regret. — Victoria Erickson
Just Showing Up
I’m often my own worst enemy when it comes to judging myself, and I know I’m not the only one. Letting go of expectations and being more present in the moment proved valuable to me. Find anything that can lead you to a state of mindfulness where you feel less distracted or anxious.
I learned that true strength doesn’t always come from going faster and harder; it can come from slowing down and turning inward. Maybe just showing up and resisting the urge to leave the room.
Being in Control
The work was mine to do, but navigating this journey often starts with a change in perspective. What seems uncomfortable and hard at first, can become the thing that helps us move forward.
And why not be in control of what kind of discomfort we want to face rather than letting circumstances dictate the narrative? Why not embrace the challenges, changes, and pains instead of letting life walk right over us?
We don’t have to be passionate about something to benefit from it; sometimes, persistence alone can be transformative. Sometimes, persistence can even turn into passion.
Read More
Check out the midlife journal for more on navigating aging, midlife, and change